{"id":2496,"date":"2011-10-20T09:58:00","date_gmt":"2011-10-20T14:58:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2011\/10\/the-lamest-of-excuses\/"},"modified":"2011-10-20T09:58:00","modified_gmt":"2011-10-20T14:58:00","slug":"the-lamest-of-excuses","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2011\/10\/the-lamest-of-excuses\/","title":{"rendered":"The Lamest Of Excuses"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>CareerBuilder.com comes out with an annual list of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.careerbuilder.com\/JobPoster\/Resources\/page.aspx?pagever=2011CallingInSick&amp;template=none\" target=\"_blank\">Most Unusual Excuses<\/a> and this year\u2019s list does not disappoint.&#160; Here it is from a press release (my personal favorites in bold):<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>1) Employee\u2019s 12-year-old daughter stole his car and he had no other way to work. Employee didn\u2019t want to report it to the police.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2) Employee said bats got in her hair.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>3) Employee said a refrigerator fell on him.<\/p>\n<p>4) Employee was in line at a coffee shop when a truck carrying flour backed up and dumped the flour into her convertible.<\/p>\n<p>5) Employee said a deer bit him during hunting season.<\/p>\n<p><strong>6) Employee ate too much at a party.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>7) Employee fell out of bed and broke his nose.<\/p>\n<p>8 Employee got a cold from a puppy.<\/p>\n<p>9) Employee\u2019s child stuck a mint up his nose and had to go to the ER to remove it.<\/p>\n<p>10) Employee hurt his back chasing a beaver.<\/p>\n<p>11) Employee got his toe caught in a vent cover.<\/p>\n<p>12) Employee had a headache after going to too many garage sales.<\/p>\n<p>13) Employee\u2019s brother-in-law was kidnapped by a drug cartel while in Mexico.<\/p>\n<p><strong>14) Employee drank anti-freeze by mistake and had to go to the hospital.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>15) Employee was at a bowling alley and a bucket filled with water crashed through the ceiling and hit her on the head.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>True confession here:&#160; I get up and walk in the early morning long before sunrise and am familiar with bats at that hour.&#160; They do buzz your head looking for insects (I think that is why).&#160; Anyway, I ALWAYS wear a baseball hat in the summer to prevent any bats for \u201cgetting in my hair.\u201d&#160; The fact that the employee used the plural \u201cbats\u201d is\u2026questionable.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>CareerBuilder.com comes out with an annual list of Most Unusual Excuses and this year\u2019s list does not disappoint.&#160; Here it is from a press release (my personal favorites in bold): 1) Employee\u2019s 12-year-old daughter stole his car and he had no other way to work. Employee didn\u2019t want to report it to the police. 2) Employee said bats got in her hair. 3) Employee said a refrigerator fell on him. 4) Employee was in line at a coffee shop when a truck carrying flour backed up and dumped the flour into her convertible. 5) Employee said a deer bit him during hunting season. 6) Employee ate too much at a&hellip; <a class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2011\/10\/the-lamest-of-excuses\/\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"bgseo_title":"","bgseo_description":"","bgseo_robots_index":"","bgseo_robots_follow":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[12,11],"tags":[119,1419,1065,105,97,1765],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5Oho-Eg","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2496"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2496"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2496\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2496"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2496"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2496"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}<!-- WP Super Cache is installed but broken. 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