{"id":2331,"date":"2010-05-07T12:45:00","date_gmt":"2010-05-07T17:45:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2010\/05\/communicate-they-do-not\/"},"modified":"2010-05-07T12:38:43","modified_gmt":"2010-05-07T17:38:43","slug":"communicate-they-do-not","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2010\/05\/communicate-they-do-not\/","title":{"rendered":"Communicate They Do Not"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>One of my favorite anecdotal websites is <a href=\"http:\/\/www.killianbranding.com\/cover-letters-from-hell\/\" target=\"_blank\">Killian Advertising\u2019s Cover Letters From Hell<\/a>.\u00a0 I promise you will laugh so check it out.\u00a0 In the meantime, here is a sample of the some \u201cunique\u201d writing:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>\u201cIt is my desire to develop and generate the revolving scheme to filter to the consuming public in.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019m looking for work because even though my company was profitable last year, this year they are expecting a large defecate.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cA flaw that I must point out because it even bothers me is that I am impatient. I hate waiting, but then again who does?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One of my favorite anecdotal websites is Killian Advertising\u2019s Cover Letters From Hell.\u00a0 I promise you will laugh so check it out.\u00a0 In the meantime, here is a sample of the some \u201cunique\u201d writing: \u201cIt is my desire to develop and generate the revolving scheme to filter to the consuming public in.\u201d \u201cI\u2019m looking for work because even though my company was profitable last year, this year they are expecting a large defecate.\u201d \u201cA flaw that I must point out because it even bothers me is that I am impatient. I hate waiting, but then again who does?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"bgseo_title":"","bgseo_description":"","bgseo_robots_index":"","bgseo_robots_follow":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[12,13,3],"tags":[1757,1575,122,890,1574],"class_list":["post-2331","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-anecdotes","category-resumes","category-sales","tag-anecdotes","tag-bad-writing","tag-cover-letter","tag-cover-letter-error","tag-funny-cover-letter"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5Oho-BB","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1691,"url":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2008\/08\/watch-the-writing\/","url_meta":{"origin":2331,"position":0},"title":"Watch The Writing","author":"Derrick Moe","date":"August 7, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"I would not hire a single salesperson without first seeing a writing sample of some sort from them.\u00a0 The information age has made writing a priority skill in communicating with prospects. This cover letter sentence makes me lose my faith in proofreading: I relocated down south due to my wifes\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Anecdotes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Anecdotes","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/category\/hiring\/anecdotes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1696,"url":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2008\/08\/cover-letter-comedy-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":2331,"position":1},"title":"Cover Letter Comedy","author":"Derrick Moe","date":"August 7, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm all for standing out, but this line at the beginning of a cover letter is a swing and a miss. If you can get me excited about your business, I\u2019ll bring the magic. I'd settle for a sales rep who brings the qualifying.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Anecdotes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Anecdotes","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/category\/hiring\/anecdotes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":208,"url":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2006\/08\/a-pleading-cover-letter\/","url_meta":{"origin":2331,"position":2},"title":"A Pleading Cover Letter","author":"Derrick Moe","date":"August 2, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"This is a new approach for a cover letter: ...please someone help me before im living under a bridge. I personally think it is wiser to explain how you, as an employee, will help the company. But that's just me.","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Anecdotes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Anecdotes","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/category\/hiring\/anecdotes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1526,"url":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2008\/04\/cover-letter-comedy\/","url_meta":{"origin":2331,"position":3},"title":"Cover Letter Comedy","author":"Derrick Moe","date":"April 22, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The Killian Newsletter is out which means another fabulous installment of Cover Letters From Hell.\u00a0 This edition features some dandies: ...take this full of life, creative, fun, hardworking, quick learner, hands-on, intelligent, good looking, individually and help him by giving him the best possible experience, so he can continue the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Anecdotes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Anecdotes","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/category\/hiring\/anecdotes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1476,"url":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2008\/03\/what-not-to-mention-in-a-cover-letter\/","url_meta":{"origin":2331,"position":4},"title":"What NOT To Mention In A Cover Letter","author":"Derrick Moe","date":"March 20, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"I have been searching through online resumes and came across this commentary in a cover letter: I am a 63 year old male just recently let go from my job because I'm too old. Don't worry, I'm fighting it but in the meantime, I need a job. You know, some\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Anecdotes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Anecdotes","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/category\/hiring\/anecdotes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1392,"url":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/2008\/01\/a-cover-letter-with-odd-confidence\/","url_meta":{"origin":2331,"position":5},"title":"A Cover Letter With Odd Confidence","author":"Derrick Moe","date":"January 25, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"This excerpt is from the cover letter of a salesperson: Telemarketing There is no better. willing to work Short Term, Long Term, Temp. Commision, depending on rate of pay. Currently i am working a sales job, however, i do not like it, although i am very good, great at it\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Anecdotes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Anecdotes","link":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/category\/hiring\/anecdotes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2331","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2331"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2331\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2332,"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2331\/revisions\/2332"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2331"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2331"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/selectmetrix.com\/blogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2331"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}<!-- WP Super Cache is installed but broken. 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