From the outstanding resume file – a resume I received yesterday for a Project Manager position:

Personal Attributes
I am highly enthusiastic, hard working, opinionated and motivated to work under my own initiative or as part of a team.

1. I have extensive practical experience of fault-finding…

Which explains why his team wants him to work on his own initiative. In all fairness, the candidate goes on to finish item #1 with:

…and problem solving systematically.

Certainly  a lot easier to do once you’ve established blame.

There’s a sentence later in the letter that suggests English isn’t a strong suit –

My team were involved in maintenance, repairing and servicing of general electronic equipment down to component level, I was responsible for a team of ten technical staffs, managing them on a day to day basis, and helping them with any problems, and ensuring the team achieved their targets within set deadlines and planning work for staff and monitoring the progress, defining where appropriate, providing regular reports to my company board and conveying practical solution on designing systems to my R&D department and risk assessment of my work.

Well if that doesn’t get him an interview, perhaps his response to the ‘Are you willing to relocate?’ question will:

Yes, London 100% and Minneapolis 50%

That’s a shame, because our position requires 100% attendance, which might be tough if the candidate is always in England, but maybe it’s like that old Superman episode (and I mean Steve Reeves, not the guy from Smallville) where Superman splits himself in two through force of will.

The kicker is probably not as funny as the writing – the position the candidate is responding to has not been on an active job board for at least a week. But with credentials like that, who cares if you take your time responding to the opportunity?

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